Darin and Judi Ramsey welcome you to our sadly neglected web site. Come in, have a look.
Danger, angry rant below. Read at your own risk.
December 4, 2010 Wow. It's been a while. Okay, quick update: Allen is married, William is an adult, and partial orphan (Bill died in August), Robinson is 9, and Benjamin is 15 months. Darin is an Editor with Bechtel, and I work weekends at McDonald's. We are living in Pasco. Okay, that said, why am I here and resurrecting this old thing? Because I need to. I'm so messed up that I need to blab about my troubles to someone, so it's you, the hapless victim who accidentally stumbled upon this site. Sorry. You don't have to read it, but I need to post it. Yeah. I don’t know where to start. I’m so messed up about so many things. I really just want to scream and carry on, but I just can’t. I’m mad. I’m mad at Bill for being an ass. I’m mad at Bill for lying to everyone about why he wasn’t seeing his son. I don’t like the crap he smeared all over my name. I’m really pissed about that. People I cared about have this really crappy image of me because of that delusional poop head and his mouth. Bill told everyone that I was keeping him from his kid, and Darin was molesting and beating William, and who knows what else that jerk said about me and my family. Yeah, well, he’s dead, with nothing to show for it except a bunch of pissed off family; some at me and some at him. Yeah, well screw all of you who think I’m the problem. Yeah, that’s what I said. I really just want to say really bad things, but it probably wouldn’t make anyone feel badly but me, so no cursing, no matter how much I really want to. Okay, so poop head drops dead of a heart attack and I find out about it because the counselor William is seeing to help deal with his extreme depression and thoughts of suicide was at work and someone he worked with asked if the William Lown in Burbank was his client’s father. No friggin’ joke. So at the end of a conversation with the counselor about moving an appointment he says “was that William’s father?” OMG. So I look it up online at the local news paper in the obits, and there it is, printed there for all to see, poop head died August 27th’ 2010. It’s September 3rd. I’m so freaked out, and really pissed. Why did nobody call? Who do they think they are that they can just go “Oh well. Bill hadn’t seen William in 8 years, he doesn’t need to know his dad is dead.” So mother-x-law and step-father-x-law tell me they tried to contact me but they didn’t have a number for us. This could be a valid excuse for some situations, but not for this one. I mean, wtf, I’ve lived in the same area since I left poop head in ’96, and even if I had left the area, x-laws could have contacted any congregation here in town and asked about my where-abouts. But NOOOO. They can’t f think of that. No, it’s just so f obvious to me that that is what you do when you are trying to find someone. Ask the elders. But I guess me and my boy aren’t f important enough to put forth any f effort. Yeah. F U both. (Okay, so I lied about the cursing. Deal.) So they decide to cremate the bastard, so by the time we find out there isn’t even a body. Yeah. F U again. God I’m so Pissed off about this. How the f could you be so f’in selfish to think that we didn’t need to be a part of this. You are so pious and perfect, and haven’t had any contact with your own fuckin’ grand son since 2000 or so, OH, such GOOD Christians. Bull shit. You fucking hypocrites. Oh yeah, you are all uppy uppy in the hall, and so great to all those around you, but you left this poor kid alone. Well fuck you. Oh, Donna buried Len years ago when he left the truth. Well, then why didn’t you contact your grandson. Bull shit. That’s all you people are. Just full of it. Yeah, and while we are on the topic, You KNEW that Bill was the one beating Allen and you didn’t say a word, and then when I fucking leave the bastard, It’s all my fault. I’m such a horrible person because I’m not going to put up with his shit anymore. Yeah. Fuck you again. Yeah. Again. I hope you rot in hell. I hope that Bill’s life comes out of your hides. You are the ones who fucked up his head in the first place. Yeah. Fuck you. Don’t bother call. I know you won’t any way. And Bob, how dare you believe that ass hole. I thought you knew me. And Lynda, you can just jump of one of those bridges you made. And Donny, no I don’t ‘love him so much’, and fuckyou very much for your assholeness about the whole fucking thing. I don’t need your shit. I have enough of my own to have to deal with. You people didn’t give a shit about Bill’s precious child that he cared so much about that he wouldn’t go to counseling in order to see him. You didn’t bother try to find me either. It wasn’t that hard. William has a Facebook account. I found you. Why couldn’t you try to look for him. Fuckers. All of you. And then you go and fuckin’ split up all his shit between yourselves and leave nothing for my boy. And that fucking crazy woman and her bull shit. First of all, how normal is it to save all the Christmas presents for years in their wrapping paper and let them pile up as a constant reminder of how you don’t get to see your precious baby. Yeah, Bill had years of toys wrapped in Christmas wrap and made out to William. That fucker had our mailing address the whole time. How sane is that. NOT. Okay, so you believe that this is normal behavior for someone? They you accuse my son of taking your shit when he has just come over to find something of the man that chose to ignore him for 8 years. Yeah, fuck you too. I felt sorry for you too, and then you go and cause all that shit for me and my boy. Yeah. You too. God, I hate you all. You have hurt my child by your selfish or stupid attitudes. My fragile little boy with his feelings clear for everyone to see. Couldn’t you see that Bill was full of shit? Couldn’t you have tried to contact William to see if what Bill was saying was true? Why did you all sit with your thumbs up your asses instead of doing anything proactive? All of you should rot in hell for your participation in the attempted destruction of my son. Fuck you all. Yeah. Bite me. My baby was cute and happy. He was always smiling. Then you ruined him, like you did me and Allen. You messed with his poor baby head the same way you did Allen. You lied to him about you and about me. Bald face lies. My nose sort of hit your fist. She deserved my ring more than I did. You stole that from me. I felt sorry for you. I let you in my house, and you stole my ring right out of my jewelry box. Then you lied about it for a month. Then you have the shit to cry to mommy about the mean woman who cheated on you, even though you MADE me promise that if we divorced I would give you grounds to remarry. You broke me, and you broke my kids too. You talked shit about me and my husband to my baby and tore him in two. You ass. My kid can’t function because he so mess up, and it’s all your fault. Yes, All your fault. I never said anything bad about you to him. I always told him you were trying the best you could. Well fuck me for being nice. You were a horrible monster. You took a young family that was happy and spiritual and sound, and fucked us up for life. Darin has spent years trying to put me back together, and has expressed frustration and anger at the damage you did to me, and how you had the best years of my life and fucked them up. Yeah, I’m mad at you about me too. Allen and his wife have talked for hours and hours about your abuse and its affects. William doesn’t remember much, but emotions make him really uncomfortable. Now that you are dead, he is starting to stand up straight. At least that is getting better. That kid is so messed up, he can’t do anything most days. He paces back and fourth and whimpers, and fusses. I can’t ask him to do much of anything. He can’t do the dishes. He can’t vacuum, can’t do school, can’t study for meeting, can’t even listen to a magazine. He’s never going to be able to keep a job. Either he will miss too much work, or blow up at someone, or walk out angry. We have him on multiple meds to try to help him level out his emotions, and it just isn’t doing anything, really. Compared to without meds, it’s a lot, but compared to normal people, it ain’t doin’ shit. By the time Allen was 18, we had very little to worry about with him succeeding as an adult. Unfortunately, those few things are still worrisome, but what can you do. We can’t be perfect. But William is so far from being able to function in the world. How can I help him be ready when we can’t even get him to stay awake for a whole day. So it all comes down to this: you hurt my kid and now I want to kill you. Every day I see the pain he carries around with him and I hate all of you even more. You are all lousy people. I hope you all get ulcers like Job did. I wish I was done. I don’t know what else I need to say, but there is still a lump in my chest and throat. I guess it’ll have to wait till next time. So if you are an innocent person who read this whole thing, I’m sorry. I guess you know why my Facebook avatar is the screaming smiley faces. Yeah.
December 30, 2005
Where we are now: Darin is Assistant Manager at the new Starbucks in Pasco WA. I am an insurance agent for Insurance Services in Kennewick. Allen graduates this year, William is in 7th grade, and Robinson is still too cute for words.
We are in an apartment in town now. Just off the main bus routes, so getting around is much easier. Good thing too. Now that I work 9-5 out side the house, we kind of need the ease of travel provided by the transit.
March 2, 2005 Update It's been a while again. We are living in a little apartment outside of town and put about 100 miles a day on our car, but other than that things are going great! We are expecting Darin's parents in the next few months, and plan to spend much of the summer with them. Darin has been promoted and is working toward his next promotion. Allen’s taking 8 classes in school (one before and one after school) and is doing well. William has added science to his ‘at school’ schooling, since I wouldn’t let him do ‘labs’ at home. (Sorry, I just don’t fancy blowing up the kitchen. Call me crabby.) He made Honor Role 1st semester. Robinson loves preschool and is looking forward to going again next year. His school is actually through the local area multi-school technical training center, called Tri-Tech. The Early Childhood Education program has a preschool/daycare program to help the high schoolers have practical application to what they are learning. As a result the preschool student to the ‘teacher’ (high school student) ratio is 1:1. We all love it. I (Judi) am back at Sears, in the appliance department. I still watch Kassidy and Madison during the week. Mostly I just spend my life in the car, as you may have surmised by the miles per day figure in the previous paragraph. I have started a new photos page, so take a look at that. I am thinking about changing the look of the site, dropping the ‘It’s a boy” thing, but I don’t know that I have that information anywhere else and my memory isn’t as good as it used to be, so I am hesitating. * shrug * Anyway, thanks for coming by. June 12, 2004 Update
Hi everybody. Life is good at the Ramsey's. Darin's mom and step-dad have moved in to the town next to us, and we are super excited about it. They have been "snow birds" for many years now, but kept their drivers and car licenses in Texas. They now have Washington plates and an address. The whole 9 yards. They are working at an RV park in North Richland for the summer, and expect to come back every year. We are so glad to have them close by. School is out and Allen is a junior. Man, are we really that old? William starts at Highlands Middle School for summer school in two weeks. He will be going part time just like Allen did. Robinson is three next month, but it is hard to convince him that he isn't three yet. Not that it really matters. We are really going to be involved in Allen's school this year. Darin is the Music Booster Club president. We hope it will be lots of fun. Kinda scary, too. We have given up on commission sales, and Darin starts at Starbucks on the 20th. He is really excited since he loved working there the last time. He expects to be promoted quickly, and hopes to have his own store (be the manager) by next year. They have started construction on one new store and hope to have two more started soon. They really need people in management, and Darin wants it. Several people have talked with him about going out to Hanford again, and he just isn't interested, even though the money is so much better. The stress isn't worth it. Over the last few years we have been trying to find out what causes Darin to have constant headaches that don't even notice pain killers. We have tried eliminating nearly every 'vice', coffee, coke, beer, etc., bought expensive pillows, a new mattress, chiropractic, everything we could think of. Last spring we started thinking that the problem might be wheat, and after some experimentation have confirmed that hypothesis. In the fall we visited with some friends who suffer from Celiac disease, and decided that is what ails Darin. His constant headaches have limited themselves down to only once in a while and they are no longer debilitating. Now any time he says his head hurts I check the labels on what ever we have eaten lately, and more times than not there is a wheat ingredient. He has even begun to react to soy sauce. We have to be very careful. The biggest side effect of cutting all flour out of his diet has been he lost nearly 25 pounds. We didn't know he had that much he could loose. He feels worlds better. So that illness I commented on in the last entry turned out to be a really bad one. The three days I was REALLY sick, I lost 10 pounds. Boy that was a happy thing. But then it took 5 weeks to recover my strength. I had serious fatigue and could barely do anything, that was very discouraging. My latest health complaint is allergies. Nothing new there, but this year they caused a serious cough. Well, coughing has caused a rib on the right side to dislodge. Talk about painful. So again the house work isn't getting done. What can you do? A friend gave us their old (5 years old) couch and loveseat since they were getting a new set. It is so nice to have a set, and the living room is really cozy now. They look new, and are very comfortable. The best part is they go with the furniture we already had in the room. It really looks planned now. February 21, 2004 Update
Hi everybody. Robinson is two and a half now, and talks very well. He thinks he can cook, fix his own breakfast, pour his own milk, and everything. At least he tries. He will climb up onto the counter all by himself, stick his food in the microwave to reheat it, and turn it on. We cannot leave him unsupervised. He loves to read and be read too. He will bring stacks and stacks of books to bed with him for us to read to him. We usually only read two, unless it is really early. He got his first cold this year (school year) and it has been a dozy. First he got fifths disease, and not he has a head cold that makes breathing a challenging thing. Night time is very loud lately. He is house broken now, but I will do a whole page about that later. He loves going to Allen's high school, that is how he refers to it, and gets a kick out of every band performance. He pulls his shirt over his head and marches around the house claiming to have a marching band hat on. He calls the movie Music Man the marching band movie and loves to watch it. His current favorite movie is Ice Age. Aunt Joanne bought it for him because he was sick. Those of you who know us know we quote movies all the time. Robinson has started naming where the quotes are from as we say them. He is quite good at it. Robinson loves to answer at meetings, too. Sometimes his answers just consist of the word microphone. Darin is working at the Mattress Outlet now. We both got very tired of the annual layoff working at Hanford, and he has gotten very far away from it. He is in a commission only job, and we are worried about whether we can make it or not, but we are going to give it a good try. Allen got all As and Bs at the semester, and William is still plugging along. The boys were off medications for 6 weeks. They sure found out that the medications work very well, and off them the boys had a hard time with nearly everything. Williams mood disorder continues to worsen, and his doctor and I think it is only time before it becomes bi-polar disorder. He tries really hard to stay even keeled, and we appreciate his effort. If this is inane and redundant, Im sorry. Ive been really sick the last few days and just couldnt spend any more time in bed, though this much has made me dizzy and I have to go lay down again now. Thanks for reading.
Click here to go to the journal!
(Darin doesn't write in it anymore. Sorry)
MARCH 23 2002 UPDATE: At this rate, the next update will be when he's 14 months old...^_^
Robinson is now crawling, more or less. He gets a couple feet, then gets tired & wants to be picked up. He has two teeth (bottom center) and is working on the top center pair and the bottom outside pair at once. So that's a lot of fun, too.
He does pretty well out in field service, and is learning to keep quiet during meetings, but verrrry slllowwwwly.
It's hard to believe we're on the downhill side of a year. In doing this update, we looked at some of the other pictures, and wow, has he changed. You sure don't notice it day-to-day, though. He's about to completely outgrow his size 6 Months outfits, so now we'll be handing those down to cousin Skyler.
Once again, I'm also making the promise of more frequent updates. With this DSL connection, edits certainly take less time...
OCTOBER 10 2001 UPDATE:Yeah, it's been forever. You raise an infant and update a website regularly.
I took the ultrasound pics off the picture page, and man does it load faster now. Nothing new up yet, though. Maybe next week.
AUGUST 12 UPDATE:Robinson arrived on July 30th at 1:55AM. The labor story is in detail at our livejournal, linked above. Sorry about the delay of two weeks in getting any pics up, but a new Dad needs some time.
JULY 16 UPDATE: We have pictures of the Very Pregnant Judi, which'll be up soon. She's very eager for the pregnancy to be over, if for no other reason than the contractions will stop. We're preparing for a move near the end of this month; yes, we're taking advantage of this opportunity and moving a pregnant family into a smaller home! We're only losing about 50 sqare feet, but that's one whole bedroom. So William will be sleeping in the living room for a couple of years, until this very economical move saves us enough money to buy or build a house. More this weekend!
June 24 UPDATE: We finally scanned last month's ultrasound pics. Yeah, sue me. We're busy people. Also got William's school photo from this year up, so you too can swipe a mugshot of our little monkey.
Judi is having very regular Braxton-Hicks contractions, and has been for a month. Uterine excersize continues, with kickboxing practice several times a day.
June 10 UPDATE: We've gone through a total of three ultrasounds now, and Judi had to have a three-hour glucose test that required a fourteen-hour fast! The result of all this is:
He's just a big baby, he's not actually due August 4th. So our due date is still the 22nd.
Not that Judi's particularly happy about that. She's huge, and starting to really suffer. She can't take anything for allergies, and she can only take Tylenol for the severe pain in her hips. We've rented a wheelchair that stows nicely into the trunk, and she uses that for any long walking, like at the grocery store or the Mall.
Still no picture updates since May 1, sorry! Having the time, forethought, and money to go to Kinko's and scan our pics all at the same time is turning out to be a rare event.
|
